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Volume XI Issue IV Classic MQ: As foretold by Nostradamus
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"There are three kinds of suns in Missouri: sunshine, sunflowers, and sons-of-bitches." — Gary Ratcliffe, Director of University Centers
UC SAN DIEGO
Dead Pharaoh Was a Real Man
Find Out How The World Ends, see p.11
Delorian Brings Down Berlin Wall, Ending Communism

About theMQ

Our meetings are every Tuesday evening at 6:00 pm. They're set in lovely John Muir College, in the Half Dome Lounge. Need to know where Half Dome is? We've got you covered.

The MQ, formerly known as the Muir Quarterly, is the official college newspaper of Muir College at the University of California, San Diego. We don't publish for Muir College alone, however. We're growing rapidly, currently publishing more than twice per quarter and distributing to the whole of the UCSD campus. Our goal is to entertain, amuse, and inform our fellow students, just not necessarily in that order. The MQ is run by students from all six of the UCSD colleges, not just Muir. Our target audience is the entire UCSD student body.

The MQ is funded by the Muir College Office of the Dean, the Muir College Parent's Fund, Muir College Council, Muir Residential Life, and our advertisers. We have also received a generous donation from the John Denver Memorial Fund.

We're always looking to expand our staff, welcoming writers, editors, artists, layout staff, graphic designers, photographers, web staff, and humans. Anyone who is interested in The MQ is welcome to join, with no prior experience necessary.

The only commitment we do ask for is that you attend our weekly meetings. It's at these meetings where we, in theory, make assignments and plan the issues. Of course, a fairly large portion of every meeting is nothing more than going off on amusing tangents whilst socializing. In the end, we're just trying to have some fun.

Copyright Information

The Muir Quarterly®, heretofore referred to as The MQ®, is a satirical newspaper intended to be read solely for entertainment purposes. All names used within any associated content are entirely fictional, with the exception of satirization. Some content may be unsuitable for children; reader supervision is actively encouraged in all applicable cases.

All materials found on this website © fully inclusive of graphics, text, and all other associated files © is Copyright © 2004 - Present by The MQ. The aforementioned materials © excepting materials provided explicitly for user download © may not be reprinted, retransmitted, or reproduced in whole or in part without the written consent of the Editorial Board of The MQ. If you wish to reprint, retransmit, or reproduce any of these materials, please contact The MQ for permission. The user retains the right, however, to transmit the URL of any of these web pages without our explicit permission, where a web page is defined as a full presentation seen within the client-side web browser. Individual elements © inclusive of graphics, text, and all other associated files © may not be linked to individually.

The MQ accepts no responsibility for all damages and/or complaints resultant from materials downloaded from this web site, nor does it guarantee the quality of any downloaded materials. All materials provided for download by The MQ are downloaded with the sole discretion of the end-user.

The MQ is a campus organization of the University of California, San Diego. The views expressed within the content of The MQ are not to be considered the views of any specific agent of the University of California San Diego, its administration, or the University of California Regents.

Any explicitly corporate images and artwork are taken from the public domain, and are thusly not held under The MQ copyrights.

Any questions or inquiries regarding these policies can be emailed to editor [at] themq [dot] com.

NEWS
IN BRIEF

FDR Totally Lame

In an unorthodox move last week, President Roosevelt established the Office of Censorship to regulate communications between the United States and foreign countries. Germany’s Führer, Adolf Hitler, released a counter-statement suggesting that the U.S. president and his actions were “lame.”

Top Ten

Pirate Euphemisms for Sex

  1. Manning the bilge pump
  2. Strumpet pumping
  3. Swabbing the poop deck
  4. Giving Polly a cracker
  5. Yo ho, blow the man
  6. Searching for treasure, in da butt
  7. 15 men on a dead man’s chest (gay necrophiliacs only)
  8. The Bluebeard special
  9. Unleashing the seamen
  10. Fucking. Arrrrrrrrrr!

SPECIAL FEATURES